Our
relative’s recent admission to the local alleged first world Gulag showed once
again how “good” the NHS is in terms of “caring” for its patients. Our relative
was admitted for an investigation at a late hour which required complex
equipment and time and having had said investigation was returned to their cell
block where they had missed the food round.
They
had been in hospital for almost 24 hours by then and the only food they had had
was a chocolate bar they had put in their “just in case” admission bag. So they
felt hungry.
When
they asked for food the computer data inputters caring for them, sorry we meant
nurses, sorry healthcare assistants, told them they had missed the slop round
and so our relative now had three options:
1) to
starve (the Nicholson/Staffordshire preferred option for all NHS comrade
patients),
2) they
could have a sandwich
3) or the data inputters could, if they could be arsed, which was heavily
hinted at as being an inconvenience to their primary function namely chatting
through the night, request a hot meal from a nearby hospital but that would
mean the data inputters doing something other than sitting at a desk chatting
about how busy their job was. It would also involve asking for a taxi to
transport the meal which couldn’t be heated up on site from the big hospital
and that was so expensive and so much trouble for them to do so when they had so much to write into the
modern care plan/Kardex to say that all cares were given except at this stage
feeding one patient.
So the
sandwich option was selected no duress in this Gulag comrades.
The sandwich was a sight
to behold. The bread was condensation covered under the cling film while the
contents were dry which suggested that this an NHS “emergency” sandwich (probably from when the Cold War was still
hot) which had been in the ward fridge for a while probably decades. It
would be interesting to see if it could have been carbon dated so the default Nicholson
option was therefore selected by our relative via the process of NHS Choice®.
The
private/public debate will continue but the cost of the taxi for the hot meal
option declined by our relative out of a spirit of public good could have be
more than offset by a 5 minute walk by a relative to a series of excellent
local takeaways. A small amount of time spent waiting for the food to be freshly
prepared would have been more than rewarded by an NHS patient having true Choice
and a good meal after a day of starving something that Comrade Gulag Commissar
Nicholson will not
understand
for he expects only Staffordshire care for “his” patients and a modicum of expenses for his bowl of rice a day subsistence living expenses.
This
was not to be for clearly there was a Health and Safety issue and an infection
control issue of preventing takeaway acquired infection to the ward bay where
our relative was confined which had 5 empty beds occupied by those patients who
were on weekend leave.
Over
the weekend there would be no whitewash deep clean of any imported takeaway
meal ingested by our relative who would be discharged 2 days before the return
of the weekenders so any moron who is not an NHS manager can see the infection “risk”.
The
takeaway would have been from a heavily used student part of town and has numerous
certificates to attest to their high hygiene standards but remember
Staffordshire may have had the same or less so you can see why NHS staff were
cautious. You can’t be too careful. The takeaway may also have been edible and
contain calories something that an unappetizing emergency sandwich may have
contained if anyone could face eating it.
Compare
that with the experience of some NHS patients who landed up in a private
hospital as part of the waiting list initiatives a few years ago who when they
said they didn’t fancy the menu (it was in French and there were no chips only pommes frites) were invited to speak to
the chef to ask what they would like to eat. And they got what they wanted –
before the young enthusiastic nurse was taken aside and told they were NHS
patients and not to do it again.
Praise
be to the Party for ensuring that British POWs were probably better fed by Red
Cross Parcels in the Second World War than UK patients are fed now if they miss
the slop round. Criminals in the United Kingdom get more spent on their food and
spend less on their TV television than NHS patients.
POWs
at least have the Geneva Convention to protect them, criminals are well served by Human Rights law, British patients however only
have Sir David and don’t forget the joke of the NHS Constitution to do the same
. . .
3 comments:
on the grounds of health and safety managers declared small kitchens on each ward extinct. We nurses were always able to knock up scrambled eggs on toast for patients who were admitted late, or keep it heated in the oven if undergoing investigations.
Recently, the nurses toaster was taken away as toast and tea was part of the post op cataract surgery (local anaesthetic). Patients now asked to bring sandwiches and a flask of tea.
Also not hot meals / for staff working nights just the railway vending machine. There may be the odd manky sandwich.
They closed the small hospital down. All staff knew each other by name and could get things done. Some weekends in the mornings if wards not full, chef would see patients and take orders for breakfast.
Guess someone, somewhere has shares in vending machinges
your blog is very nice i like it .
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