Dear GMC,

I am an average British GP.

I am Caucasian/Afro-Caribbean/Indian/Chinese/Australasian /mixed race.

I am male/female.

I am a Christian/Muslim/Jewish/Sikh/Buddhist as well as agnostic/atheist and part time Satanist.

I am heterosexual/bisexual/gay/celibate.

I am a member of the Conservative/Labour/Liberal Democrat Parties together with being a Communist and a Fascist and many other political parties too.

I read The Times/The Guardian/The Daily Telegraph/The Daily Mail/The Daily Express/The Mirror/The Sun/Daily Star as well as Pravda and the Morning Star and many other journals including Railway Modeller and those in our native languages including occasionally English.

I shop at Sainsburys/Tesco/Waitrose/Aldi/Morrisons/Marks and Spencers/Lidi and a local corner shop amongst a host of others.

I watch BBC1/BBC2/ITV/Channel 4/Channel 5 and subscribe to Sky but never watch any late night pay to view channels honest.

I drink alcohol, smoke tobacco and eat far too much and sometimes far too little and may even be teetotal or vegetarian.

I drive a car, ride a bike or a motorbike, fly planes, sail and sometimes walk and race lawnmowers.

I enjoy sailing/shooting/horseriding/unarmedombat but sometimes flower arranging/needlework/reading/my family/exercise/reading and loads of other legal sports, hobbies and activities including work with religious and youth organizations.

I go to a church/mosque/temple/synagogue and the odd covern.

I am a member of the Territorial Army/British Red Cross/Medicins san Frontiers/Cafod/Unicef and a host of other organizations and charities to whom I give my time for free or for payment.

I have killed, maimed, seriously injured and broken the bones of my fellow human beings sometimes in war, sometimes in peace and many times on the sport’s field.

I have suffered illness sometimes self inflicted, sometimes acquired and worse still have prescribed for others who are not registered patients in time of emergency.

I read and write blogs.

All of the above statements apply to the some of the many doctors’ life experiences that we here at ND Central have learned of while working with them over our collective lifetime in medicine.

So why GMC are we writing to you?

It appears that you at the GMC are undertaking a sham consultation as to whether you should regulate our “personal” lives as doctors. We all know that consultations of this kind are merely precursors to a done deal.

Perhaps you should put on your consultation what an ideal doctor should be? Dr Finlay? Dr Kildare? Dr Frankenstein? Dr Watson? Dr Shipman? Dr Mengele? Dr Forest? Dr Donaldson?

And who will decide who is racially and socially pure enough to have a private life free from GMC regulation?

We do not have a problem with professional regulation but when we are not at work that time is ours, not yours, it is called freedom. If what we do with it is legal and does not abuse anyone what is it to you?

This increasing regulatory approach reminds us of some other regulators from history some of whom you probably admire with first names like Adolf, Joseph and Mao. Will you be advising us next on an appropriate dress style for use in our free time? Perhaps a black uniform with matching red armbands and long black boots or will it be a tweed jacket and brown brogues?

By way of conclusion and we know you are above the law remember the Human Rights Act 1998 and the European Convention on Human Rights article 8 which we reproduce for you in the hope that someone can read, and more importantly, understand it:

ARTICLE 8

1. Everyone has the right to respect for his private and family life, his home and his correspondence.

2. There shall be no interference by a public authority with the exercise of this right except such as is in accordance with the law and is necessary in a democratic society in the interests of national security, public safety or the economic well-being of the country, for the prevention of disorder or crime, for the protection of health or morals, or for the protection of the rights and freedoms of others.

And if we may be allowed to use a quote from a religious book:

"You hypocrite, cast out first the beam out of your own eye, and then shall you see to cast out the mote out of your brother's eye".

The Bible, The New Testament, Matthew 7:5.

And on a lighter note there is the old religious joke whereby Jesus says “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone” which is followed by the punch line “Put that stone down mother!”

Is the modern version now to be “Put that stone down Niall!”?

Is the standard for doctors’ personal lives to be those high ones that are currently abroad in today’s journalistic profession?

If you want to comment you may do so here.

Praise be to the Party for this highly hidden gem of consultation as they all are. You know they make sense. No doubt all those who dare to express an opinion will be monitored for any deviation from the future Party line.