NHS productivity exceeds all targets for the better of patients.

All good Soviet run institutions like targets and just like the former USSR in the late 1970s used to boast of exceeding all grain production targets while conviently ignoring the fact that the USSR had to import grain from Canada and the USA to feed their population while fighting a war they lost in Afganistan the NHS is no different.

All NHS targets are of course met by the hard work of the politicians who define them and all those targets not met are by the failings of those who actually treat patients those idle people on the front line if you believe Party organs like the Daily Mail. 

Take NHS 111 (Dumb, Dumb, Dumb) a “service” which alone has contributed to a massive increase in tractor production of some 192% in its referrals to emergency departments from January to October 2013 when it was a mere 374,506 to January to October 2014 when its production of 3 wheeled tractors increased to 1,092,967 against a total number of A&E attendacnes of 21.7 million a massive 5% productivity gain comrades for a speciality that is struggling to recruit doctors and failing to meet its politically defined target. 

Furthermore comrades the efficiency gains of the great political idea of NHS Dumb, Dumb, Dumb are also reflected in a massive 186% increase in its referrals to primary and community care from a mere 2,844,452 to 8,138,863 in less than year against a mere 330 million a year GP consultations. 

The idle overpaid GPs will have no problems coping with a mere 2.5% increase in workload from just one source of retarded “technicians” with a mere 6 weeks training on a computer system whose output is like tossing a coin either see a GP or go to A&E. 

Further more comrades NHS Dumb, Dumb, Dumb have increased their turfing rate for in 2012 they managed to use self care for 48% of calls while in 2013/4 this was down to just 15%. NHS redirect only turfed 1 in 3 calls to GPs and A&E when it was around so a turf rate of 85% just shows how NHS efficiency gains are working so well.

Add to that a politically determined decrease in GP work force availability by politicians who have not a clue deciding to waste hours of GP and their staff’s time producing tractors that do not work called care plans, risk stratification and admission advoidance all of which has done sweet FA and meant that GPs and their staff do not see patients which has been as useful as a vicar standing up in Hiorshima saying God is Love as the first atomic bomb fell (other faiths and politicians are available to achieve the same end result).

Ask any GP or their staff today in practice how they would describe their workload today and they would probably use a very naughty grunt word like sh*t.

The Daily Mail says GPs are sh*t and have launched a do you wait more that 4 weeksfor an appointment hot line?

Of course in the same way that a decrease in GPs numbers and funding against an increase in demand is not news and neither is an increase in NHS Dumb, Dumb, Dumb referals to General Practices or A&E departments across the land the fact that the Swinton surgery once had 9 GPs but has dropped to 5 and cannot recruit replacements is not news and this is for one reason only.

In order to understand why a decrease in GPs while the number of patients remains the same could lead to an increase waiting time you might have to be able to do complex maffs called share bys.

Jounalists and NHS managers don’t do sums which is why those at NHS England say there was only an 86% rise in calls refered to GPs by NHS Dumb, Dumb, Dumb.  That was probably the number of fingers or cloven hooves present in the meeting on a Friday afternoon when they discussed this while trying to find someone who could switch on their abacus.

Praise be to the Party and its organs for highlighting the problem and completely missing the cause of it. Anyone got a mirror or more importantly know how to use it?