Monday, 17 August 2009

NHS Employers opt out

A lot has been written recently about the possible detrimental affect that the European Working Time directive (EWTD) may have on the training of junior doctors by an enforced reduction (by Europe) of their working hours. Not much on the effects of sleep deprivation which is a standard form of torture unless applied to junior doctors when it is called “training” or “experience”.

We are sure that most senior doctors would be happy if the pilots that fly them to their holidays were working the same hours as they worked as juniors in order to gain “experience”. Tired pilots are not a problem which is why their hours are so tightly regulated.

While trawling the net we stumbled across an item on the Remedy UK website about the NHS employers introducing a “voluntary” opt out form for the extreme crisis that is the current flu panic, sorry, pandemic. The form is here.

Now why would people at this stage even be thinking of such a form? Are we not the best prepared country in the world for flu? We are sure that those planners who have had many years to prepare for the ETWD, sorry flu, who were granted an opt out for several years to allow them to prepare for the ETWD,sorry Flu pandemic, are ready. Indeed, given our best prepared country in the world status for the EWTD (sorry Flu), Alan “Postman Pat” had to prepare an urgent review of the situation even though his Party had been in power for the last 12 years and knew it was coming.

We like advanced planning here at ND Central. See a hole in your tyre and NHS management will plan for weeks on how to repair it rather than actually do something useful like repair the tyre before it bursts. When the tyre bursts it is never their fault as they had lots of plans about this situation so we are all right aren’t we comrade? Flat tyre going nowhere = NHS management in inaction with Flu and EWTD.

We liked the wording of the form. Given that it is most likely to be introduced in a period of panic (sorry pandemic) we suspect that clause 2 will be modified to never give you notice about ending this agreement and clause 3 will become and work for free.

We know that local F1 doctors, who used to be called housemen aka housedogs, are now being asked to “voluntarily” sign disclaimers saying that they “don’t want to work a mere X hours a week please let us work even more hours oh please, please can we?”

We are sure these forms will be “voluntary” along the lines of if you don’t sign you won’t get a reference and hence might as well give up your medical career now. In the same way that Nazi SS guards would have said to their victims in a Sgt Wilson like voice “Do you mind awfully stepping into this gas chamber? It is, after all, for your own good.”

No hidden agendas here comrades the EWTD, sorry Flu, opt out form is for the good of the Party and its efforts to fight the Great Patriotic War against Pandemic Flu.

Given the state of the economy, should not EVERY person in employment be signing such forms? For example MPs should “voluntarily” sign an opt out form to forego their 82 day break. After all it is clearly a good Socialist principle to stop the exploitation of the working classes until that is you become the employer.

Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Remember the junior doctor who sees you in hospital gets 82 days off each summer. The politicians who dictate this sh*t* don’t. Or did we get this wrong somewhere?

Praise be to the current Party that was born out of evil employers taking advantage of their poorly paid overworked workers. La plus ca change la plus c'est la meme chose?

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