Wednesday, 20 May 2009

Tales from the Gulag or visiting a patient in ZaNu Labour’s NHS 001: Parking

At long, long, last our relative has finally had their surgery for cancer after a 98 day wait but remember the Party has decreed a 2 week wait for cancer referrals (Praise be to Gordon and Alan for the delivery of excellent NHS healthcare here in Northernshire).

Unfortunately our relative lives in a top 20 twenty “world class commissioning” PCT which means that choice is restricted by Comrade Commissioning Commissars via Choose and Book.

Our relative made the potentially “fatal” mistake (we are not talking in growing toe nails here) of “choosing” other than what the all knowing NHS Commissar managers has decided is best for them.

Remember NHS managers rarely have any medical knowledge. Some are failed nurses, failed social workers even ex receptionists here in Northernshire and so are far more experienced than anyone with a medical qualification (for example a “care apprentice”) will be as they have not seen patients or illness for years (if ever).

Exercise non Party choice, good comrade, and you wait. 98 days.

Choose Party “Choice” as did our relative’s co-workers with the same condition and you are in the next week at the local tractor farm.

The local NHS managers feel that keeping money in the local healthcare system is a far greater priority than giving patients the best possible care or what is otherwise known as NHS plc “Choice”.

Targets “met” but quality very suspect.

We come now to the issue of parking under ZaNu Labour.

In the good old days you could, as a visitor, park in a hospital car park for free. You still can in a private hospital car park with security as well. In the land of the Free, you may even be escorted at night to your vehicle by an armed security guard for no charge.

Park in the UK in the wrong place or for too long and you will be clamped. There is a 30 min wait time but how long does it take to get discharged? We will see later so if you naively use the 30 minute spot you will lose out.

But this is the third world or less that is the UK NHS.

Now as the efficient ”market” forces that ZaNu Labour have introduced using the communist system of one price for any commodity means that the NHS Management growth industry can only make money via car park charges not by providing healthcare. All the parking machines say the tax, sorry income, goes on “patient care”.

We shall see later how this money is being spent on “patient care”.

This is currently £3.00 per 4 hours here in Northernshire.

We were in a queue, 12 long all piling in coins to visit their loved ones, and the queue was growing. The comments from some of the comrade visitors and tax payers were:

Visiting is only 14.00-15.30 hrs and we are charged at 4 hours minimum for parking”.

Can’t they do better as we are over a barrel? Visit or not visit?”

“I feel so sorry for those poor MPs. I bet on their expenses they couldn’t afford to visit for every day for two weeks”.

These were some of the politer comments as two geriatric parking attendants tried to maximise income, sorry help patients’ relatives park, in the rapidly filling parking area by squeezing cars in a reasonably ordered manner into any nook or cranny.

The first time we went, in the 3 minutes it took to queue and get a ticket, the car park went from empty to full with attendants turning people (who wanted to visit their relatives who were patients) away.

That is really, really sad turning away income like that. The Managers must not be able to sleep at night as having to employ geriatrics to regulate parking must detract from their potential income stream.

How long does it take to visit patients in Gordon and Alan’s 12 years of “free” at the point of delivery NHS?

If you live locally then there is a 30 minutes drive (X2) to a centre of excellence BUT you have to arrive half an hour early to get a place and then 1.5 hours visiting assuming no blips.

If we go to the local shopping malls we don’t pay for parking. We only pay for what we buy. So you can go there on a whim, park and leave buying nothing.

Not so in the free at the point of delivery NHS care unless you live in Scotland or Wales and you don’t visit a PFI hospital in these countries.

The “market” (shopping) versus the “market” (New Labour’s NHS).

One of these works, the other?

Well draw your own conclusions.

How many employers will allow 3 hours a day for a week to visit a loved one?

15 hours out of 37.5 hours for an hour and a half’s visiting session or 7.5 hours visiting a week. Time clearly well spent hospital visiting = sponging.

So no time off.

Parking taxes - all ZaNu Labour NHS policy (except in Wales and Scotland) and no doubt extra parking managers too!

Praise be to the Party and its co-payment system still at work in England. But not in Scotland or Wales.

No Celtic discrimination here then comrades?

One NHS, one “United” Kingdom?

Not in healthcare or parking.

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